Have you ever had a moment when you were at a loss for words?  Maybe your best friend just told you that her mother died.  Maybe you just found out you lost your job.  Maybe your child comes to you pouring their heart out.  Sometimes moments happen in our lives and we just don’t know what to do or say.  I’m here to tell you, that’s okay.  Sometimes there are just no words.  It’s okay to just be silent.  Whether you are alone and silent or with your friends or child, being silent is okay. Silence is powerful.  Sometimes when we are silent that is when the most healing happens.

Typically, we do not like silence.  Silence makes us uncomfortable.  Whether we are alone or with others, silence is unwanted.  When we are alone we have the radio on or the TV on in the background.  When there is a break in the conversation with others, we get uncomfortable.  Have you ever caught yourself trying to fill the silence?  If you have, I challenge you to wait and give the silence a few minutes.  When you are by yourself let your minds wander.  Let yourself think about:

• Your dreams
• Your desires
• Pay attention to what your body is telling you
• What is your heart telling you
• What, if anything is bothering you

See what happens when you listen to yourself.  See what comes up.  Confront what needs to be confronted and remember you do not need to do it alone.

When someone tells you something that leaves you at a loss for words, be silent.  Sometimes your silence is the answer.  A lot of the time we think we need to say the right thing and fix the problem or help by offering some encouraging words.  When a lot of the time people just need you to be there.

• Listen
• Cry with them
• Hug them
• Put your arm around them and just be there for them.

You don’t have to have the right things to say.  You just need to be there.  Let silence fill the room.  It will probably feel weird and awkward at first but wait and see what happens.  I bet something will take place that will amaze you.

There are times in counseling when the therapy room becomes silent.  It’s not because our client has stumped us and we don’t know what to say.  Our silence speaks volumes.  Some people just want to be heard.  There is a time and a place for silence.  Sometimes what we have to say wouldn’t be beneficial in that moment, but just letting them know that they are heard may be just what they need.

Practice silence in your life and see what happens.