How to Fight With Your Spouse, Part 1: Expect Conflict

How do you fight with your spouse?  For those of us who have a lifetime partner, the art of arguing is a valuable skill.  This brief article, and the one following, are going to propose that it is possible to navigate marital conflict.  I can’t claim to have the step by step guide to arguing,…

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Of Barrenness and Burning: When Life Seems Bleak

As far as the forest is concerned, the season has switched from fall to winter.  The branches are bare, and the forest floor is evidence of a year gone by.  The other day, as I arrived at the trail I like to run on (first time since fall was in full foliage), I was surprised…

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How Can I Find A Spouse, Part 5

The Golden Key To A Woman’s Heart After a long delay that included a vacation with my darling wife for our sixth anniversary, it’s time for another installment. Last time I spoke directly to women about finding a true man of love and honor; a true gentleman. I was speaking to men as well, because…

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Mental Health and Running

It’s a chilly Oregon spring day, and an 11-year-old boy is about run his first competitive race, in all his 6th grade glory; the 800-meter-dash. The short shorts and tank-top barely cover his slight frame which is subsequently covered in goose-bumps caused by chill and nerves. Through the crackly bull-horn comes, “Runners take your mark…”…

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Shame, Part 3

As we continue on in this series on shame it is important to know that shame and guilt are two different things.  Sometimes they overlap and we can get them confused.   But here is the difference, Guilt: “I did something bad.” Shame: “I am something bad.” Sometimes our guilt causes us to feel shame.…

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How Can I Find A Spouse, Part 4

We long for a spouse who answers the needs and cry of our soul. We’ve talked about finding someone who fills the spaces in your heart and soul and personality; a person who is your match and one who makes you feel alive, with whom you have chemistry and feel the passion of life. All…

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Shame, Part 2

When was the first time you felt shame?  Do you remember an instance when you began to feel shame?  Maybe you didn’t know it was shame, maybe you would categorize it as embarrassment.  That is where shame starts, with embarrassment.  Maybe you did something and were criticized for it.  Maybe something happened to you such…

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How Can I Find A Spouse. Pt 3

Last time we talked about knowing yourself and then looking for someone who meets you in who you are, one who is a match for your personality, emotions, likes and dislikes – who will be the true companion to all of you. The belief that opposites attract is out there, but research has shown that…

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Shame

Welcome to our series on shame.  Shame is powerful and if we let it, it can take over.  Maybe you are wondering if you have ever experienced shame, or maybe you are struggling with shame right now and you are wondering how to break free from it.  Most of us have experienced shame at one…

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3 Tips for a Healthy Marriage Through RESPECT

It is commonly known that the Grammy winning song “Respect”, as recorded by the legendary Aretha Franklin (Atlantic, 1967) is a variation of a song originally written and recorded by the blues and soul pioneer Otis Redding (Volt, 1965). Redding wrote and recorded the song “Respect” as an anthem for men; a desperate plea from…

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